Tell her you've had sex
Now, don't just walk up to her and say "I have had sex," but you do need to make it clear that you have banged a girl before (even if you actually haven't). You can mention it pretty bluntly, like "yeah so I was banging this chick once and..." but she will probably be disgusted and call you a pig. That's ok. Sooner or later, she will start thinking about what you said and realize that you're not a virgin and thus know how to please a woman or at least know where her vagina is. Girls need this reassurance so they know you won't cry after the first time you have sex together. A little while after you make it known that you've had sex, she'll text you with something asinine like "so... wut r u doin 2nite lol." Score.
Wear a lot of layers
A t-shirt and jeans may feel comfortable, but girls think it's tacky and sloppy. Every girl has seen on average 45 hours of Project Runway and thus think they are fashion experts. The key to fashion is layers. Wear a t-shirt, then a long sleeve shirt over that, than a button up shirt (but for the love of god don't button it up), then maybe a polo shirt, then a sweater and two jackets with a scarf. Also buy nice shoes, but ruin them so they hold no value any more. It shows that you're rich enough to afford those shoes, but cool enough to just not give a damn and take care of them. Basically try to look like Andy Sandberg from the I Jizzed In My Pants video at all times. Although maybe the friction from all the extra clothing is causing him to jizz his pants prematurely.
Have the exact opposite interests as her
Do poorly in at least one of your classes (or pretend like it)
The fastest way to a three-room apartment on Just Friends Ave. is by showing a girl you are smart. Straight As won't impress a girl, neither will that certificate from the President that you got at the end of the school year. Girls will think you're a dorky nerdlinger if you make good grades because she will think you don't know how to do anything but study. Now obviously you shouldn't sacrifice your grades just to impress a girl, but at least lie about doing bad on a test or something. EXAMPLE:
You: I had to write this ten page essay for History, I couldn't do much else.
Girl: Wow, you sound like a boring geek.
Now, even if you did spend all weekend writing a ten page essay for History (an A-? I SPENT ALL WEEKEND ON IT YOU ASSHOLE) you shouldn't say that. EXAMPLE:
Girl: What did you do this weekend?
You: I had to write this essay for History, but after I wrote a page I just blew it off and chilled.
Girl: Wanna go out?
